2010 Gentleman of the Year: Round One

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Time for the people to decide who is the Biggest Gentleman of the Year. Here is the full bracket

Abby Region
1 Jim$ v 8 Muary Fucking Povich
Jim$
– Defending Gentleman of the Year
– He’s a fucking gentleman
– Someday, people will tell tales of the Dierck$en administration and I will say that I was proud to be alive in such an era; properly coined as “The Dierck$en Era of Prosperity”
– Tried to not run this year
– A 3x godfather
– Only person to ever make Rick drink

Muary Fucking Povich
– Is an excellent golf teacher
– Likes college girls
– Believes Maryland would make more money if the cheerleaders cheered topless
– Has determined the paternity status of countless people

Abby 1v8: Who is more Gentlemanly?Market Research

4 Original Jim$ v 5 Mike’s Pizza
Original Jim$
– Wealthy.
– Got beers for us when bar was closed.
– Supports the LG.
– Owns a country club.
– Has supplied us with many free meals.
– Invented the “cool breeze” style basketball lay up (behind the back under the legs)
– Excellent financial consultant

Mike’s Pizza
– Makes the food of the gods
– Has never made a bad slice
– Is kept in business by Rick
– When he went on vacation for two weeks. Rick cried

Abby 4v5: Who is more Gentlemanly?online surveys

3 Jurgen v 6 Arnold Palmer
Jurgen
– Hosted a gentlemanly gathering at his palace
– Bought coffee for everyone
– Busted out the Jameson Special Reserve so we could have Irish coffee
– Vanity. $1600
– He would like to speak to a representative at the front desk so he will call someplace else. Thank you have a good night
– He is also a warrior having sustained the most bruises and cuts out of all of us.
– Steinbrenner of the CoG

Arnold Palmer
– Bobble Head Night
– Invented the most gentlemanly drink of all time
– Also a golfer of some note

Abby 3v6: Who is more Gentlemanlysurvey software

2 Joyce v 7 Dayman
Joyce
– People were leaving, it was the leaving time and people were leaving because it was the leaving time and people were leaving
– Called Olivia angular
– Got trapped in a rape van
– Kinda looks like a Carlos
– Bought Dmo and Ostrowe White Castle
– Allowed JMac and Ostrowe to spend 24 hours on his couch, and cooked us burgers
– Came up with the idea for the Chilean miner costume, end result being us showered with applause and picture requests
– His dance push up at Jim$ wedding led to another person doing a dance pushup

Dayman
– Fighter of the Nightman
– Champion of the sun
– Master of karate, and friendship for everyone

Abby 2v7: Who is more Gentlemanly?online surveys

Tata Region

1 Ostrowe v 8 Isiah Mustafa aka The Old Spice Guy
Ostrowe
– He doesn’t desecrate the flag.
– Has a gentlemanly bachelor pad in Nyack
– OLH. OBT. O _ _
– El jefe do los mineros de Chile

Isiah Mustafa
http://warmingglow.uproxx.com/2010/04/tim-erics-old-spice-commercials-are-awesomely-ridiculous
– Most gentlemanly of deodorants/body washes
– Is on a horse

Tata 1v8: Who is more Gentlemanlyonline survey

4 Hutter v 5 BP
Hutter
– He bought me a tits tshirt
– He’s wealthy
– He banged natalie
– He owns the borgata
– He bought daryl underwears.

BP
No Reasons

Tata 4v5: Who is more Gentlemanlycustomer surveys

3 Anfron v 6 Rob the Bartender
Anfron
– Especially due to this email which I am not sure if we can post online or not
– Speaking of which I am 2 seconds away from bamgiong a ligeit again
– Send the CoG awesome foreign emails
– Asians love boozing. My bauce tried banging an asian banker and he tried to get me to bang her assistant
– Moved from a cube to his own private office
– Big Time

Rob the Bartender
– Enjoyed our shenanigans
– Kept serving all of us even though we were clearly hammered
– Chanted “T!I!T!T!I!E!S!” along with us
– “T! I! T! I! … Wait I fucked up”
– Teach me how to Dougie

Tata 3v6: Who is more Gentlemanly?online surveys

2 Mar v 7 John Hamm
Mar
– I’ve concluded that the only thing better than big titties is….BIGGER TITTIES!
– Was not sober once in Vegas.
– Taught a hook how to dougie so she wouldn’t steal his camera
– Discovered that Night Fever makes all the girls take their clothes off

John Hamm
– Incredibly handsome
– Makes Mad Men one of the most critically acclaimed shows on television
– Excellent SNL host
– Handsome
– Appeared on two of the first 3 episodes of Conan
– Quite handsome

Tata 2v7: Who is more Gentlemanlysurvey software

Precious Region

1 Rick v 8 Nikko
Rick
– Randomly created and scored a sheep.
– He takes criticism and corrects his playlist.
– Volunteers his time at ARC to chaperone events, whereas ARC = the COG and events = any gathering of the COG
-Keeps Mike’s Pizza in business
– Kept Mar and Joyce alive on the streets of Baltimore

Nikko
– Es el Capitan de Los Cosmos, and Fall 2010 Champion Coed team
– Always happens to be at a bar when his friends are about to leave
– Introduced the world to “Heathers” and assorted hangouts with no formal signs on them.
– Hip style of dress, yet not a “hipster”
– Proverbial Expert on all things related to NYC nightlife
– NYU Degree
– Columbia Grad School Degree (pending)
– Goes by Kyle Mou
– Won Rick a slice of pizza by misspelling “Schizaffin”

Precious 1v8: Who is more Gentlemanlyonline survey

4 Enrique Iglesias v 5 Brock Singleton
Enrique Iglesias
– Baby he likes it
– Escapar
– This is premature
– He bangs Anna Kournikova.

Brock Singleton
– Challenged Jim$ to a cotton candy eating contest at a Pirates Game
– Let us stay in his house that smelled like piss
– Took us out in Pittsburgh to meet college chicks
– Has a dog that a stripper left at his house once after sleeping with him
– Shit his pants on the flight back from India this summer
– Defended our country and takes down Big Lenny
– Drives without a shirt in West Virginia.
– A true gentleman.
– Lemonadey!

Precious 4v5: Who is more Gentlemanlyonline survey

3 Jmac v 6 Keenan
Jmac
– Brought imported onion dip to Daryl’s Mansion Warming Party
– Created “Daryl’s Mansion Warming Party” song
– Brought Mrs. Joyce flowers for mother’s day
– Chipped in for Mother’s Day dinner with the Ostrowe family
– Rich
– Handsome
– A Godfather
– Only person to hook up at Jim$ wedding

Keenan
– Muscle
– Darts
– Bangs fat chicks
– Likes TK
– Let Ostrowe borrow his jacket to walk home after his was stolen
– Gave me a futon and coffee table when I moved into my apartment

Precious 3v6: Who is more Gentlemanly?customer surveys

2 Poppers v 7 John Heim
Poppers
– Clubster
– Can grow a fantastic wedding beard

John Heim
– His engagmenet party was a booze cruise around Manhattan
– He has a pool that he lets me work from in the summer time and always provides cold budwesiers.
– He is a former bartender at Fitzy’s and Walsh’s
– He’s also marrying a boatload of money, smart man.
– Met Poppers once. Punched him really hard in the chest

Precious 2v7: Who is more Gentlemanly?Market Research

The Redhead Region

1 Dmo v 8 Jason Derulo
Dmo
– Beat up Criss Angel
– Won millions in Vegas
– Looks at chicks applications
– Run the Gentlemanly Fantasy Football league
The cornerstone of the CoG
– Owner and operator of Club Tit$

Jason Derulo
– Has released three incredibly catchy hit singles from his debut album
– Amanbsa likes that song where he says his name
– He’s ridin’ solo, he’s ridin solo

The Redhead 1v8: Who is more Gentlemanly?customer surveys

4 Goon v 5 Gary Williams
Goon
– He is a top chef
– Popped the shirt off during our badminton screwjob loss
– Always Sunny is his favorite show
– He has great Ts
– “How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice. Hi, I’m John.”

Gary Williams
– Bangs college slimmies
– Likes to eat wings and booze
– Works for a gentlemanly university
– Was awarded the 2010 ACC Coach of the Year
– Made the fist pump cool before Jersey Shore

The Redhead 4v5: Who is more Gentlemanly?online surveys

3 Eddie O v 6 Extra Hour of Sleep
Eddie O
– He is married to a gentlewoman.
– He drinks straight bourbon.
– He is a known gentleman.
– He scored 4 touchdowns in one game.
– He just got peg a fork.
– Squats 400 lbs. at the gym.
– 500lb if listening to Baby I Like It

Extra Hour of Sleep
– Allows us to be less winded throughout the day
– Is an extra hour for Dougla$ to count his millions
– Is an extra hour for the ac/heat to distribute through anfron’s corner office so that the temp is optimal come Monday

The Redhead 3v6: Who is more Gentlemanly?online survey

2 Daryl v 7 Colin Cowherd
Daryl
– “I just built Rio the Snowman. He is lacking all major appendages including stick arms. He has no carrot nose because I was too goddamn lazy to get a carrot, and I lack coal or a corn cob pipe to complete the illusion…”
– “I usually disappear into convenience stores and show up at the bar again, 45 minutes later, holding a bag of Doritios. This is what I’m told happens anyway”
– Taught his kidney spanish so it could play on the Mets. It batted .294 with 10 HRs and 72 RBIs. .992 Fielding Percentage
– 6 Martinis at the wedding

Colin Cowherd
– Reasons to follow. There on a post it on my desk.

The Redhead 2v7: Who is more GentlemanlyMarket Research

May the god bless you forever

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